Did you hear about the contest to find a new nickname for Toronto? Not that Toronto needs a nickname. Nonetheless, Eye Weekly worked up some type of event and in the end, pronounced this town El Toro. Lord. As Mel Lastman used to say: “El Toro Poo Poo.” Look, names should not be embarrassing. Hamilton devised an excellent diminutive. Thanks to that Anglo-Saxon suffix er, it’s now named in unpretentious style The Hammer. It seems to have caught on with the Hammerites. Back in Toronto something equally unaffected is needed. Like The T-Bone. Simple and saucy. We like the image evoked by this one. Much better than “Hey Hey Toro. Senor Bull is lazy.” But we also like the energetic Pronto. Close enough, eh? How about The Rex. Come on folks stay with us. Dinosaurs, Tyrannous types etc. But Toronto doesn’t really need a nickname. We have to banish know-it-all writers who call it Torawnna. This is ignorant because no local would let that slip out. Torontonians sometimes say Torono, permitting a genteel dropping of the second T. Ono. Ono. Could be.
