A report says that it’s not the streetcars that are slow, it’s the riders. It takes so long to get people on and off the cars because, well, because it takes so long. It’s their fault, not the streetcar’s. Councillor Minnan-Wong sets us right: “It’s not the car’s fault,” he says. “It’s the loading and unloading of passengers.” But the wonderful new streetcars have more doors. That will mean passengers can get on and off faster says, Minnan-Wong. People are so silly trying to ride on streetcars that they can’t get on and off of quickly. They don’t deserve the nice things streetcars do for them. Streetcars are better and smarter than people. That’s why they’ve taken over Mr. Minnan-Wong’s brain.
